Getting Healthy Again In Your 40's Is Possible
Feeling better starts with one step
Somewhere along the way we learned that getting and staying healthy, especially in our 40s, has to be an all-or-nothing effort.
You’re either on a specific eating plan (paleo, vegetarian, intermittent fasting) - or you’re not trying at all.
You either have to do everything right, or you’ve fallen off track.
And if we can’t do everything the social media people tell us to do perfectly ⎯ because we are busy working, and raising kids, and holding it all together ⎯ it starts to feel like there’s no point in trying.
But this belief, that we have to do it all to get healthy, is exactly what’s keeping us stuck.
What if getting healthy didn’t have to feel so hard? What if it could fit right in the middle of your real, busy life?
There was a time, before the rest of the RNs and staff at work got used to my “gluten-free-ness,” that someone would comment on the food I brought to work for lunch.
“Oh Sarah, you are so good! You must really stick to a diet.”
I would think to myself, but this is just chicken, sweet potatoes and brussels sprouts…how is that being “good” when it’s just regular food? Why is this considered to be a “diet?”
I’m not blaming this person for thinking whole foods must be some part of a diet, or that it is hard to live this way. That was the unspoken content of her statement: that becoming healthy is a giant challenging project that is too time consuming for any working-parent.
Usually when people say things like this to me, they are specifically referring to foods. But the sentiment applies to exercise, sleep, and stress management as well.
I think we’ve somehow heard from society that in order to be healthy it must be a painful process, full of multi-step routines, or a slog. We’ve also heard we need to fast, take supplements, do this specific morning routine, don’t eat that type of food, eat this type of food, just do these 3 easy steps…phew! It’s all a bit overwhelming and confusing.
No wonder health seems unattainable for working moms. At this lovely age of 40 we have kids to care for, jobs to balance, aging parents to support…and it seems like there isn’t time to get healthy if it’s too hard.
I made a decision, just over a decade ago, to release the “health is hard” mentality. I realized the messages we receive from diet and health culture don’t actually make me feel better. They were making me feel worse! Why would I try to get “healthy” if it meant I need all sorts of extra time, discipline, and energy I didn’t have?
I want to enjoy my efforts at figuring out wellness activities and how I can maybe, dare I say it, have some fun while doing it?
Achieving wellness doesn’t have to be hard or annoying or so time consuming that it’s impossible for us folks who have other people to take care of, too.
Take The First Step
The first step for me was to let go of the grind of what I saw on social media and other platforms. I focused on one intervention that would work for me, in my life. One intervention that would help my body specifically, feel better. One step that could give me more energy.
Since I suffered from IBS - massive gas and painful bowel movements- I dug into the science of gut health. Call me a nerd but learning about how the human body works has always been my favorite thing since Mrs Miller had us open piggies (sorry) in high school anatomy class.
Learning about how the microbes in our guts affect our poop and brain is super fun!
Gut health eventually led me down the road to mental and brain health. The two have a wonderfully complex relationship that affects our mood, digestion, and even mediates our preference for sugar.
Letting go of “getting healthy is hard” mindset and choosing to believe that “I can do one thing today to feel better” has changed my life.
Start small, focusing on one thing at a time
Don’t get distracted with the overwhelming number of options you’re shown each day to get healthy. Pick one health intervention that has grabbed your attention and you’ve been thinking about. Pick the one that excites you the most to try because you can tailor it to your life.
Remember that you don’t have to overhaul your whole life to feel better or obtain a new level of health. Since you are a busy working mom, it’s important to feel okay with taking small steps toward health. You will actually get to your health goals faster this way.
I started off with the one step of taking out gluten for a couple weeks. Those weeks turned into months. And then years. I didn’t have much support for this change 15 years ago, but I knew that I immediately felt better with fewer GI pains, headaches, brain fog and skin issues.
I wasn’t thinking about the 1,000 things I needed to do to be healthy, just the one step of removing gluten.
I don’t want to minimize that the struggle for health is real. I’ve been there. And I still have some really hard days where I am sad that I still have headaches and experience big bouts of anxiety. Being in my 40s has its own set of challenges with perimenopause and changing hormone levels.
The difference is that before I made the decision to look for easy and energy-giving ways to health, I would sit in the sadness of how hard it is to cook gluten free meals, give up donuts, and spend 10 minutes a day meditating.
Now, I can more quickly get out of my funk and tell myself what a joy it is to be able to do these things for my body, mind and spirit. I’m grateful I get to chop veggies, do deep breathing exercises, and move throughout the day.
It took me awhile to get to this place where health is easier, but it all started with one step at a time.
On a walk with Nugget
My favorite way to get moving in the morning
Your turn: chose your one step
Without thinking about what you should do to get healthy, what’s the first thing that comes to mind when I ask you:
What gives you a tiny spark of excitement to think about trying today to help you feel better?
Maybe you’d like to take a 10 minute walk outside.
Maybe you’d like to try 4-7-8 breathing in your car before your next work shift
Maybe you’d like to go to bed without scrolling through social media
After you write down the first step you are going to take today to start feeling better, tell someone about it. Tell them when you plan to take your step. And even how you might celebrate taking this step.
That’s it! I changed my life of gut issues and headaches when I decided to take just one step.
Aaaaand, it hasn’t been a giant, time consuming project.
You’ve got this.
xo, Sarah
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